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We talk about love languages a lot in regard to relationships with others – but it is also important for your relationship with yourself! Here are 100 love language self-care ideas for the 5 love languages.
Love languages are an important thing to consider when discussing the important relationships in our lives.
Whether it be with friends, family, or a romantic partner, understanding your loved one’s love language can really help your relationship thrive.
The thing that so many of us forget is that our love languages are also a key part of our relationships with ourselves.
If you are unfamiliar with the 5 Love Languages, let me give you a bit of background knowledge to help this make a bit more sense.
What are Love Languages?
The 5 Love Languages come from the ideas and writings of Gary Chapman. Chapman’s book, The 5 Love Languages, introduces, explains, and highlights the importance of love languages.
Essentially, love languages give insight into how a particular person receives love.
Gary Chapman, a marriage counselor, found that different people respond differently to acts of love. The way that one person expresses love may not be received as love by their partner.
You can see how this could lead to disagreements, arguments, distance, and feelings of disconnect in a relationship.
It’s important to understand your partner’s (as well as your own!) love language so you can know which ways to express love to them.
But what’s talked about less is how this applies to self-love.
If we want others to show us love in a specific way, why would we not show ourselves love in that way too?
This is where love language self-care really comes into play. Understanding your love language and showing yourself acts of self-care in alignment with that is key.
The 5 Love Languages
The 5 Love Languages are Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.
These 5 Love Languages are the main categories of the way we give and receive love. Let’s break them down a bit more so we have a super clear understanding of what Chapman means by each of the 5 love languages he lays out for us.
Words of Affirmation
People with the Words of Affirmation love language (this is me!) tend to recognize the power of language. This love language thrives off of compliments, verbal support, vocalized reassurance, and kind messages. VeryWellMind describes this love language as “expressing affection through spoken words, praise, or appreciation”.
Acts of Service
Those with a Words of Affirmation love language really appreciate actions that show support or appreciation. This love language finds a lot of meaning in the seemingly-small everyday tasks that your partner helps you with (ie. unloading the dishwasher, making dinner, cleaning up the house, etc.). Small acts of kindness mean the world here.
The Receiving Gifts love language is exactly how it sounds! This love language finds meaning and affection in gift-giving. Oftentimes, this is less about the gift itself and more about the time, effort, and thought put into the gift. People with this love language tend to hold onto gifts and may even create relationship boxes of all the meaningful little gifts shared.
Quality Time is another fairly self-explanatory one. This love language feels the most loved through attention and quality moments spent together. Whether it be a date night or a night in on the couch, spending time with a loved one is important for this love language.
The Physical Touch love language is another self-explanatory one. This love language thrives through physical connection and touch. Hugs, holding hands, sexual intimacy, cuddling, and massages are all examples of how this love language may feel and express love.
How to Find Your Self-Love Language
Your self-love language is in alignment with your general love language. It makes sense that the way you feel, give, and receive love from others would be the same when applied to yourself.
In order to practice love language self-care, it’s important to know your love language first.
To do this, you can simply evaluate the things/actions that make you feel the most loved, valued, seen, and appreciated.
For example, as a Words of Affirmation girl, I know that supportive comments, compliments, and the phrase “I’m proud of you” make me feel so incredibly loved.
If you want more of a guided approach to finding out your love language, take this quiz.
It’s quick and simple and the results break down your connection to all 5 love languages and put them in order.
Once you know your love language, we can explore different love language self-care options to make yourself feel loved.
100 Love Language Self-Care Ideas
Here are some different ways you can show yourself care through your own self-love language. This list gives 20 ideas for each love language: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.
Words of Affirmation Self-Care
- Keep an affirmation journal
- Write yourself a letter of appreciation
- Utilize affirmation cards
- Put kind words on sticky notes around your home
- Try a guided self-love affirmation meditation
- Vocalize self-confidence affirmations in the mirror
- Set reminders on your phone with nice compliments
- Journal all the things to love about yourself
- Create a self-compliment jar
- Start a gratitude list
- Have a self-love mantra
- Surround yourself with people who vocalize their love
- Journal about your strengths
- Practice positive self-talk
- Create self-compliments (try this self-compliments sheet!)
- Work to quiet the inner-critic voice
- Follow self-love journal prompts
- Vocalize when you are proud of yourself
- List your achievements
- Talk kindly to and about yourself
Acts of Service Self-Care
- Clean your bedroom
- Change your sheets
- Pick up your favorite takeout dinner
- Take a self-care shower
- Cross something off your to-do list
- Plan your week out in advance
- Fill up your car with gas
- Set up a cozy space for yourself (blankets, candles, etc.)
- Clean your bathroom
- Give yourself an at-home spa day
- Organize your space
- Schedule a full self-care day
- Prepare a healthy meal
- Schedule an appointment/check-up
- Do your nails
- Practice skin-care
- Tackle a home project
- Workout/move your body
- Start a side-hustle
- Rearrange your living space
Receiving Gifts Self-Care
- Take yourself on a shopping spree
- Place an online shopping order
- Treat yourself to a splurge item
- Get yourself something you’ve been wanting for a while
- Create a self-care kit of goodies
- DIY a project
- Book a luxury appointment for yourself
- Buy yourself flowers
- Pick up your favorite food from a restaurant
- Invest in your hobby/career
- Enroll in an online class
- Take yourself on a date
- Invest in your education (online blog courses are how I started this blog!)
- Buy your favorite coffee
- Take a solo trip
- Buy a new self-care item (skincare, hair care, bath bomb, etc.)
- Get a new plant for your home
- Get your hair done
- Get your nails done
- Have a spa day
Quality Time Self-Care
- Take a solo trip
- Have dinner with yourself
- Have an at-home date night with yourself
- Take yourself to a local cafe
- Go on a solo walk
- Go for a drive
- Read a book
- Binge-watch a new TV show by yourself
- Explore a new city by yourself
- Take a self-care bath
- Do yoga
- Have a no-phone day
- Start a daily reflection journal
- Start therapy
- Try breathing exercises
- Get out in nature
- Take a day off of social media
- Watch the sunset/sunrise
Physical Touch Self-Care
- Take a self-care bath
- Try a new body scrub
- Use good-smelling lotion
- Practice skincare
- Stretch your body
- Go for a walk
- Take a workout class
- Dry brush your skin
- Pleasure yourself
- Give yourself a hug
- Massage your scalp in the shower
- Foam roll your muscles
- Get a massage
- Wear comfy clothes
- Use essential oils on your skin
- Ice roll your face
- Schedule a pedicure
- Book a spa day
How Will You Use Your Love Language for Self-Care?
After learning more about your self-love language and how to practice love language self-care, how will you be changing your self-care routine?
Have you already been practicing self-care for your love language? Will you be adding in new self-care activities? Let me know in the comments below!